University alum to compete on stupid reality show “Sweet Home Alabama”

We suspect she is up to something. Our money's on a one-episode exit. (Photo courtesy Country Music Television)

It’s every girl’s dream: A once-in-a-lifetime chance to compete on Country Music Television for the affections of a bartender.

Stefanie Williams, a 2008 graduate of this university and a former Diamondback opinion editor, will premiere on the second season of CMT’s “Sweet Home Alabama” on Oct. 20, according to a press release, and vie for the heart of one “Tribble Reese” with 19 other women. No joke. That’s the guy’s name.

The release says that “while Stefanie love sports, she’s has had a few rough experiences in dating athletes and is looking to branch out.” Don’t let that word “few” mislead you — Williams has quite literally written the book on dating athletes and maintains an extensive daily blog about sports and dating that uses a lot of capital letters and curse words.

It also appears her definition of “branching out” from athletes is a little lax — the guy she’s going for is identified as a “former Clemson quarterback” in the same press release.

It’s possible that she means “branching out from dating successful athletes,” which is certainly more true — though Reese spent a year playing at Charleston Southern University, this “former Clemson quarterback” completed six passes in four years at Clemson and is now listed on his website as a “television personality, model, and bartender extraordinaire.” Ol’ Tribble is, however, quite muscley.

Reese was the runner-up in last season’s competition, which ended a month ago and pitted 10 “country” guys against 10 “city” ones. A New York Times review explains that the delineations are exactly as silly as one would think:

Country, in the show’s definition, largely means Southern, and Southern is reflexively equated with an affinity for hunting and fishing and playing quarterback at Clemson. The city boys are caricatured just as absurdly, with one, an employee of the Creative Artists Agency, leaving the show of his own volition because he cannot handle the heat. The “Green Acres” shenanigans are set in Fairhope, Ala., on Mobile Bay, where the temperatures are serious enough that it is easy to sympathize with him.

The most recent image uploaded to Reese's Facebook page. Really.

Reese’s website features his hauntingly teal eyeballs staring at you no matter where on the site you go. The résumé page is particularly enlightening — it’s where you find out that his “movie/television” experience includes “college football,” in which he played himself on ABC, CBS, NBC and ESPN, presumably stretching his acting chops by standing on the sideline holding a clipboard.

Under “special skills,” we also discover that he’s good at “competitive football,” juggling, ping pong, driving a car (automatic or manual) and “dialects (southern, preppy, English/Australian).” The résumé also says Reese played for the Carolina Speed, an indoor football team that plays in “Bojangles Coliseum” and is sponsored by several restaurants, a siding company and a barber.

It appears that his website excludes that his first name, according to Clemson graduation records, is actually “Herbert.”

Reese’s Wikipedia page is classified as an “orphan” but has been revised extensively since a marketing firm, claiming Reese hired them to, mangled it earlier this year.

Stay tuned for more coverage in the print edition of The Diamondback and a liveblog of the show Oct. 20.

You can also check out Campus Drive on Facebook and on Twitter at @theDBK.

One comment on “University alum to compete on stupid reality show “Sweet Home Alabama”

  1. Oh god, years after graduation the Diamondback comes back to haunt me. At least you guys didn’t show my block in the editor’s office…. 😉

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